Today we’d like to introduce you to Tanja Blume.
Tanja, let’s start with your story. We’d love to hear how you got started and how the journey has been so far.
I was born in Berlin, Germany and went to school there for 18 years and then I came to the US in 2017.
When I was about three years old, my little brother had a severe car accident which changed my entire family.
My Dad had his own business and my mother did as well, plus having me and now a full-time-care-requiring-baby. For some miracle, my brother survived but from then on it was going to be years of hospital visits and nights at the grandparents’ house because Mom and Dad were with my brother.
They were extremely hard-working and somehow managed to hold our family together and never made me feel like I was being left out. I remember my Mom being worried about me thinking they cared too little for me but I never felt that way. They were always supportive of me.
When I started going to school, I think I put the burden on myself to be “easy”, to not make any trouble and be somewhat of a “grown-up” to support my family, so they didn’t have to worry about me too much. I never really thought of it that way until a couple of years ago because it just happened. I still act that way. I try to easy, not to cause any more trouble but I am learning that I can also speak up and that I should speak up if something’s not right.
In school, I started isolating myself because some of the other children didn’t understand what had happened and started calling my brother and my names and started bullying me for having a couple more pounds on the hips. I didn’t want to tell my parents at first, thought I could handle it but I definitely couldn’t and eventually, my teachers talked to my parents.
I never felt like I was a part of the social life of my class and I really wanted to be but I more and more sunk into myself. There were times when I would just sit in my room and be there. Just sit and stare holes into the air.
Later on, I sat in my room and watched movies instead of interacting with people. I came from school and did my homework and after that, I sat in my room and watched movies, my Mom got annoyed with me a lot because I wouldn’t leave my room.
Continuing that my grades weren’t too good either in high school, which essentially was the one thing in elementary school that was going good for me, I felt. But in high school, I studied and studied and it didn’t seem to be enough. Then, I started pressuring myself because I had a certain expectation of myself and I kept failing at reaching those expectations.
For all my remaining school career, I kept building up shameful feelings towards myself because I didn’t achieve nearly as much as I wanted to and I am (always have been) a stress eater, so I started eating out of frustration. I still do it, but now, I sort of know how to control that. But at that time my feeling of not being enough and not being pretty enough followed me every day. Some days it was better, some days it was worse.
I discovered that one of the only things that made me feel good and where I felt like I was being at least a little good at was telling stories, in Drama and Theater class. I said to myself, ‘This is what I want to do!’
I felt that I could be good at letting people know that they’re not alone, creating and telling stories for people to relate to, especially young people.
In one of my final years at high school, my Mom and I were sitting somewhere in a cafe and joking about me going to acting school in the US and eventually receiving the Oscar and how funny it would be to write my ‘Thank You Speech’ with being only 16 years old. So, I went home and that’s what I did!
I researched Drama Schools and ended up at The Lee Strasberg Theatre and Film Institute in New York.
My Drama teacher and my entire family were super supportive of my decision and as soon as I finished school, I left for the US. I’ve found great friends at the school and even though it took a while to let myself feel comfortable I think I made the right decision.
I have graduated from the Institute this year, early 2019, and am on the loose now!
I’m very grateful that my entire family is so supportive of me and my path and knowing that my brother is on his way too (he’s now 17) makes me feel proud.
And although I am still fighting the feeling of not being enough, and the constant thought of ‘I’m not doing enough’ I have learned that the process of my well-being is a daily fight and on some days, I’m stronger and on other days, I am not so strong but I will keep going.
I have learned that I am good enough. We all are!
Overall, has it been relatively smooth? If not, what were some of the struggles along the way?
My road has not been very smooth but then, I don’t think that anyone could say that from themselves. I think everyone has faced hardship in one form or another in their lives, no matter how young they are and no matter where they come from. And I think our job is to acknowledge that and respect each other for that.
I’ve always struggled with my weight and how other people perceive me. I was worried that people don’t like me because of how I look and it took a while to accept and acknowledge that not everyone has to like me or has to like what I wear. I still worry about that sometimes but I am also getting better at looking at myself and saying ‘Yes, I like how I look today!’ Some days, it works better than others but feeling comfortable in your own skin is important. I strongly believe that your overall feeling and health will improve by you taking a step towards yourself.
Another big issue has been bullying or being bullied. I was bullied for most of my school career and I always felt like I didn’t belong or I was doing something wrong. I always thought it was my fault that people didn’t like me, that people were gossiping behind my back and excluding me.
There were times when I apologized to others because I thought something that happened was my fault. I still apologize for more than I should probably but I am getting to a place where I can say no or where I can accept that not everything is my fault or even appreciate when I did something good.
I think a lot of people don’t really acknowledge when they were good at something or just appreciate any achievement that they had because they worked for it.
My anxiety follows me around, clearly, and I don’t want it to but I am learning how to deal with certain situations. A lot of times, recently, I read ‘Do something every day that is unexpected or you wouldn’t normally do.’ I think that’s great advice. Do something that is new that you wanted to do for a while, like go into the bookstore around the corner that’s been there for a while and you’ve never gone inside or message an old friend. Sometimes, people surprise you.
I have to say I’m very glad that more and more women are speaking up about what they’re facing and I think a lot of the struggles many women can relate to, I think we’re all connected and it’s up to us to talk about things and encourage each other as much as we can.
My only advice that I can give is to talk about struggles, to speak up about issues because you may not know it but maybe the person next to you has had a similar experience and doesn’t know how to address it. They may be happy that you spoke about it to give them the courage to do the same.
What do you do, what do you specialize in, what are you known for, etc. What are you most proud of? What sets you apart from others?
I have studied Acting and at first, I thought I only want to do acting but I realized how many opportunities I have if I just do all of it, or at least try.
Alongside my acting training, I have taken screenwriting classes, as well as on-Camera classes. I have recently started a class for directing.
So far, I have mainly worked as an on-stage-actress. I have performed Off-Broadway in a production called ‘Frolic!’, directed by Joe Naples. This was a comedic piece in a showcase-styled performance.
My biggest stage project so far has been an international collaboration with the Hungarian Director Dora Endre in production of ‘My Name is Rachel Corrie!’, a one-woman show. We have performed in multiple locations in Budapest this October with planned future performances in the US, as well as a Europe Tour in 2020.
I am currently working on an experimental short film called ‘MOMENTUM’. I wrote this film in my final semester at the Institute and am now in pre-production for this film.
This film is about a woman and a-day-in-the-life of this woman, we follow her for one day from getting up in the morning to going to bed at night and we witness hardship and the daily struggle she has to overcome.
This film is particularly important to me because I strongly believe that we need to be more aware of the people we’re surrounded by and treat each other with respect, mainly because we all have a past that we carry around with us all day long and we never know how heavy a bag the person next to us is carrying around today. And think about how our actions affect other people’s lives and how much damage we may be causing.
I chose a woman as my main character because I have been, and still am, surrounded by extremely strong women and this film is a tribute to those who have been encouraging me my entire life, regardless of how much they struggled to keep their lives together.
My plan for this film is for it to be shown at international Film Festivals to reach as many people, women in particular, as possible.
I will not be acting in this film but I am producing it and I will also be directing it. I hope to get as many international women on-board as possible. Starting with the Lead Actress Katrine Maximiliane, a German actress.
At the moment, I am mainly focusing on this project to be finished. The shoot dates are going to be late January and I am aiming for it to be finished with post-production as soon as festival season starts.
I have one more film I am aiming to shoot in 2020, approximately late spring/early summer. I am also planning to finish writing a mini-series called ‘The Color of Violence’ early next year. This series focuses on different forms of violence we witness in our everyday life and violence on the big screen that happens all over the world with its goal to reach people and encourage them to speak up and stand against that violence.
So much of the media coverage is focused on the challenges facing women today, but what about the opportunities? Do you feel there are any opportunities that women are particularly well-positioned for?
I think this is a great time for women! Of course, there are challenges and that won’t change tomorrow but we are being more aware of those challenges and being able to connect on such a big level with other women, from all over the world and support each other, that I think it is incredible how far we’ve come.
Another reason why I chose to have a Lead Actress and aiming for a strong female crew is because I want to open opportunities for other women as well as connect with them. There are so many talented women out there. And yes, we still have to prove ourselves in so many situations but I see it as another opportunity for us to take the lead.
There are so many opportunities for women, in every area, all over the world. Focusing on the arts, and film, in particular, I have found there have been more women filmmakers taking the lead in the past couple of years and rose to create great films on an international basis than there have ever been.
On social media, there are a lot of groups where women from all kinds of different fields can connect with each other and I think this is an incredible tool.
There are so many networks that support women, there are grants being issued for women to focus on family and career at the same time. We don’t have to miss out and more important we have the right to decide what we want to do and when we want to do it!
Contact Info:
- Website: www.tanja-blume.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tanja_blume/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tanja.blume.167
Image Credit:
Headshot by Rex Lott Photography
Katrine Maximiliane
Strasberg Institute Archive
Posters by Dora Endre and Tanja Blume
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