Today we’d like to introduce you to Adjente Burgess.
Hi Adjente, please kick things off for us with an introduction to yourself and your story.
I’d say my life started and I mean, truly started almost nine years ago when my mom made the big choice to leave our small agricultural hometown in Central Florida (Bartow, FL) and decided to do an overnight move to this strange abnormal place called Atlanta. Moving to such a major city from a little town that didn’t even have Starbucks or a mall for miles around to a city that has a Starbucks on every corner was mind-boggling, and to be completely honest I hated this place at first all the noises and lights, police sirens and lights was overwhelming. Fast forward three years and I’m in my sophomore year of high school and like many other people in their high school years still trying to figure out who and what they are, and I’ve finally come into accepting the fact that, I’m a gay African American male and though my sexual orientation is a part of me it does not define me.
I’m sure you wouldn’t say it’s been obstacle free, but so far would you say the journey have been a fairly smooth road?
My life has been everything but smooth most of my life is probably comparable to most African American people of my generation. Growing up in a single-parent home usually led by the mother, grandmother, and/or aunts. The challenges that I faced personally growing up in a small town was a great deal of bullying and harassment from kids at school, in my neighborhood, and family members young and old. Growing up I used to get harassed about my normal speaking voice by other kids and family members, to them I didn’t sound like the average little boy. The children in my grade would always say things like “are you a girl” and they’d push me around, but I’d say the worst that has gotten was a time where some kid tackled me into the grass and took off my pants to actually see if I was truly a little boy. That was probably the most humiliating thing that I’ve experienced besides being chased home on a bicycle.
A more recent challenge that I’m still facing and trying to overcome is my brush with experiencing domestic violence from what I do consider my first real relationship. We were together for almost 4.5 years and basically grew up together he was my best friend and dare I say my first real love like when Mary J Blige said “I’m searching for a real love” I could’ve sworn she was talking about him. As time went on, I started to notice some major changes in personality and temper and though I know people change overtime, but these changes were like night and day but me being young and dumb I stuck around and mentally and emotionally fought for the relationship even when people were telling me to let him go. Fast forward a couple of months he had to move out of his parent’s house and lived with some friends and he didn’t like it, so we started looking for apartments. After some searching, we found a good one in his area, but he didn’t quite meet the financial requirements by himself. So, I packed up my clothes and got a plane ticket and we move in together.
Not even a few weeks in and I was already having to defend myself when he would have his fits of rage and I would literally find myself trying to escape him even if it was only for a few hours, but I’d always find myself coming back. Living on the other side of the country with no friends or family he was all that I had there. A few months down the line July of 2021 we had one last major incident that completely broke me and after all the mental, emotional, and physical abuse the one thing that finally made me choose to go home was the whole time that we were living together he was being disloyal, and cheating was the last straw line crossed before I realized I was constantly loving and valuing someone else who couldn’t do the same for me because me in those moments didn’t really love or value myself. So that is a challenge that I am still working on day by day is learning to love myself and value myself more and more as time goes by.
Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
At the moment I’m working part-time while also trying to find more freelance modeling opportunities and doing online schooling for real estate and interior design. Though I am not a certified interior designer I can walk into any room, restaurant or office and give a whole spreadsheet of things that I would change or alter depending on budget or what’s needed. My mind is always looking for ways to make anything look better thus why I’m pursuing a more creative career-oriented occupation. I’m known for my personality that’s gotten me in touch with some people that I would consider pretty influential or likeminded, but I’d say the two things that I am most proud of is for one how far I’ve come, and my mother for always being there and for her starting her own business Sassy Scents by Sonia.
We all have a different way of looking at and defining success. How do you define success?
Success for me is simply waking up every day, and I say that because there is some in this world that didn’t wake up this morning. Though it may seem small that’s what I would consider a success at its bare minimum and as long as I achieve that goal every day for as long as I can I’ve hit a level of success and whatever happens after that will lead to even greater success.
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