Today, we’d like to introduce you to Portia Effinger.
Hi Portia, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. Before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today.
The fuel to my fire has depth. I believe my story began before I ever realized it; the day that my mother lost her mother at the age of 11 shifted the trajectory of our entire family lineage. Consider this: you never realize how much the history of your parent’s grief impacts yours until life begins to life.
The way I processed things and the way I navigated through healing was a direct reflection of what I saw and the lack thereof. When I had my first encounter with loss, my natural response was to show strength in deflection. In my youth, I never really sat in my feelings, discussed them, or felt as if there was a safe enough space to do so.
I guess you could even say, to some extent, I didn’t know what my feelings were. It wasn’t until a few encounters with grief, coupled with my professional experience as a Nurse that I realized I had unresolved feelings that negatively impacted my coping skills. Plus, grief has this weird way of sneaking in and stealing back its time.
In 2017, the loss of my bonus Dad triggered something BIG, not just within me but my entire family. Life was just different. It was as if, at that point, every ounce of grief that I ever deflected from had then consumed me. In those moments, I actually realized I had not ever grieved. I just kept going. I decided to become active in choosing a healthier journey and sharing my experience with the ones I loved most.
The discomfort I felt in doing so made me realize, the world needed just as much of a healing space as I did. It’s certainly a tough conversation to have with oneself, but this is where the real work began; within the reveal. In finding my healing and loving on my little brother just a tad harder, my empathy for children who grieve grew.
The Recharge Project Incorporated was founded in 2019 to provide a safe space around the Atlanta area for children to grieve and express their inquisitive feelings, surrounded by Grief Love. Sharing my passion for grief has allowed me to become a grief coach, educator, international speaker, and now a published children’s book author. Little Michael’s Big Grief is a must-read and aids in extending my mission to stop the stigmas surrounding mental health and grief-centered conversations around the globe.
Ultimately, I’ve gotten to where I am today by listening to my inner voice, advocating for those who can’t for themselves, reflecting routinely, and recharging as often as I need. The kids that I work with in my programs are my world. Each time we meet, I have the unique opportunity to pour into the healing of my inner child, and I love it here. In the midst of our family’s grief, I found purpose.
Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not, what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way?
Life has certainly not been a smooth road, but I will say even in my darkest moments, through faith, I’ve always managed to find its value. Although I do grief work, the reality of death and loss is still a struggle for me. Some have this misconception of people who work in grief or healing spaces, that they don’t need healing, too.
I’m here to say, no, I’m not exempt from the rollercoaster of feelings that grief brings, and I believe that’s what makes my work so dear. Transparently, I have this love-hate relationship with funerals. The death of my best friend was hard. Losing my Goddaughter before she had the opportunity to live was difficult.
My dad left this world before I had the opportunity to sincerely share my gratitude for his presence in my life, which is extremely frustrating. I used to frequently ask God why. Until I finally realized my grief created the groundwork for it all. The guilt, the anger, the depression, the bargaining, and acceptance all still cycle despite the time-lapse.
Each day I choose to grieve, as I find meaning in my losses and embrace what I’ve gained. Being able to help others overcome their struggles, gives me that hope. The thing about grief that most don’t realize, it is a journey never a destination. It is filled with highs, lows, and the accumulation of the new. We all have grief and no form is greater than the next. Our grief molds us, it shapes us into the beautiful beings that we are.
Our journey through healing is what we make it, and I wouldn’t trade mine for the world. If you don’t recall anything else, remember this: those things that we do not reveal can not heal, and we can not begin the journey without acknowledging its need. Let’s have this necessary open dialog. It’s ok to grieve out loud.
Thanks – so, what else should our readers know about The Recharge Project Incorporated?
My business is helping others navigate and find deeper meaning through their grief. You should know that everyone grieves, but not all of us acknowledge our grief in a manner that promotes healthy healing. I specialize in helping individuals identify their strengths and areas of opportunity when navigating their journey.
What sets me apart from most grief specialists, coaches, and educators is that I don’t stick to one specific formula. There is no universal grief support guide. I choose to meet individuals where they are. Starting with the youth of the community, I have had the opportunity to understand the importance of catering to the needs of an individual’s journey.
I’m most proud of my brand because it reveals authenticity and allows others to deepen their relationships within themselves. Helping others is always a win. Ultimately I want individuals to know that grief is tough, no matter what form and you don’t have to go at it alone.
Yes, grief therapy is a thing. There is a grief educator somewhere out there to enlighten you on your journey. Lastly, grief coaching is a great resource for navigating moving forward. There is no one-size-fits-all manual. However, if you find yourself in challenging times, there are resources available; simply plug in until you find which is right for you.
What do you think about happiness?
Happiness is the greatest gift this journey has given. Each day I go out into the world, I have the opportunity to be someone’s light. Whether at the clinic or in the community, I can show grief some love. This is my happy space. If nothing else great happens in my life, I can sincerely say that I am grateful. I find so much joy in helping others, sharing my gifts with the world, and turning this dream into a reality.
In all my work, the greatest joy I’ve had the opportunity to witness comes from seeing the impact my programs have had on the lives of these children. Seeing them and their families connect, support, and bond with one another makes my heart smile. We have literally formed our own little village, and it’s absolutely amazing.
Contact Info:
- Website: therechargeproject.org
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thegriefnp?igsh=MTgxcW94Y3pjcXJpeA==
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/portia.chine?mibextid=ZbWKwL
- Other: Grieflove. co
Image Credits
Kirkland and KP Audio Visuals
