Life and Work with Samantha Alvarez

Today we’d like to introduce you to Samantha Alvarez.

Samantha, let’s start with your story. We’d love to hear how you got started and how the journey has been so far.
Art has been a safe zone for me since I was four years old. Painting and drawing were the starting points. It keeps me well-grounded. When I am not doing this, I feel like I am missing a big part of myself.

I have always defined myself as an artist. Although I was always doing what I loved, I felt this overbearing emptiness inside of my gut. It was this feeling of not being good at anything. During my senior year of high school, I began to notice a hyperactive drive to do many tasks at once, leaving little time to be alone with my own thoughts. I thought this would be the answer to erasing all of my problems, but it also caused me to feel like I was running a marathon too fast at the start, then burning out before the end of the race. By the time I started college, I was spiraling into a severe depression without even realizing it.

My life truly started in my early 20’s. I met a woman named Cassie Aguilera at a free art class close to home, that lasted for several months. She asked me what my field of interest was. I was studying digital animation at the time, so she referred me to an organization called Downtown Community Television Center for free film classes. She immediately called up the Director of Youth Programs, Johnny Ramos, and scheduled an interview with him for as soon as the following week.

I was ecstatic to check out the space. When I first walked in, it was as if I was taking a look into my future self. I began attending their youth program in early 2015 with no filmmaking skills, yet was given the opportunity to use the space to incorporate all of the mediums of art that I knew best. With that, I created a film that changed my life forever. Voz Del Azul was the largest step forward in both my career and my personal growth. Through this creation, I jumped down into the core of my depression and pulled it up into the surface to deeply analyze and confront it. I used it as a creative outlet to express and unravel my inner voice.

I was able to come to the concluding decision that my depression does not have to be who I am. I also wanted others to be able to feel like they can be open about their mental illness as well. The youth media program directors at DCTV really opened the door for me to be my authentic self, and I am grateful for that.

Has it been a smooth road?
Because of past self-doubt, the journey to my current path was not an easy one. I fell more than I stood up, for a while. I was ready to give up my life all together, but my artwork remained a big support system. Ultimately, this was the biggest struggle of mine.

Eventually, I grew tired of the way I was feeling and practiced self-care routines. I created my own opportunities. It wasn’t until I stopped closing myself off from the world around me and self-reflected, that I looked at my flaws in the eyes (as an entity) and embraced them.

What’s the most important piece of advice you could give to a young woman just starting her career?
The advice that I would give young women who are just starting their journey, is to look inward and ask yourself what exactly is holding you back from doing what you want to do. Understanding where that doubt is coming from and confronting it with a desire to better oneself is what can really push someone’s life forward in a great direction. It’s never going to be an easy ride down the road of what you want, but it is important to continue to keep your eyes looking forward, and your mind on your goals no matter what distractions try to stop you. Always be open and direct about how you are feeling. Self-care is not selfish.

Please tell us more about your work, what you are currently focused on and most proud of.
I am a freelance multi-disciplinary artist. Currently, one of my jobs is a Youth Media Instructor. I am giving back what I self-taught, to teens that are currently trying to find their own voices. The mission is to make the space safe and fun for kids to feel comfortable with expressing themselves while using film to foster positive change, with a special focus on political and social activism.

Although I am a filmmaker, I am also known for painting and animation. I wouldn’t say that I am a brand, but I am definitely working towards making a name for myself in the art world. What sets me apart from others is that all of my art is a self-reflection. I create for myself, but I also use my experiences as a safe space for others who may be experiencing similar inner battles. The women in my artwork are different versions of myself either being vulnerable, unlearning toxic patterns or having empowering motives. This has been the best way for me to face my problems straight on, while not being able to ignore them. As a creative, I believe that recreating these problems into visual conversations or self-reflections is a very therapeutic alternative. The artwork won’t change the situation, but it will make it easier for me to see and understand, while helping me take the steps needed to better improve on those conflicting areas. And as I continue to work on improving myself, I hope to empower other people to be their best self too.

Are there any apps, books, podcasts or other resources that you’ve benefited from using?
I read a lot of auto-biographical books on mental health. Some of my favorites are An Unquiet Mind, Girl, Interrupted and The Bell Jar. It reassures me that I am not alone and I am not making up the way that I am feeling.

The blogs that I read are mostly about film. They help me learn a lot more of the technical and analytical aspects of filmmaking. I was actually inspired enough to work on a blog (not yet published) with a close friend, for women of color in film.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: www.instagram.com/salvarez_art

Image Credit:
Samantha Alvarez

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