Today we’d like to introduce you to Brendan Abernathy.
Brendan, let’s start with your story. We’d love to hear how you got started and how the journey has been so far.
So in a way, I feel like I’m this super surprising candidate to be a musician and at the same time destined from birth to write and perform. Because, on the one hand, I started playing guitar when I was six and was the first to jump in front of a camera in home videos. But on the other side of the can, I always wanted to be seen as “successful” or whatever, so I studied Economics, learned Spanish, was involved in all the “right” things in college. I struggle with being addicted to success and image, I think to some extent.
As I was preparing to graduate from UGA, I began exploring career options and as I looked around at my friends and classmates, everyone seemed to take similar jobs or pursue very impressive careers. I looked into consulting, public health, private equity – you know like these classic things that people would look at and say, “Oh wow… Brendan is crushing life.” But purpose and my “why” has always been central to me, and I had a hunch none of these would fulfill me – personally.
I went up to the woods in North Georgia and turned off my phone for three days – read, wrote, prayed, sat in silence – trying to figure out what to do with my life. Then, the day I came back to Atlanta, my dad and I went to the Taylor Swift Reputation Stadium Tour at Mercedes-Benz. Taylor is a large reason I write music and her songs have been with me through finding myself, so this was a total dream-come-true to see her live. When she sang her Long Live/New Year’s Day mashup, I watched all my childhood dreams flash before my eyes and heard 70,000 people screaming and singing along, and I was overwhelmed with regret for a decision I hadn’t made yet – I didn’t want to take the jobs I was considering. I wanted to impact people like this. I wanted to write songs that struck hearts. I wanted to connect with people in their toughest and most beautiful times.
Accelerating a bit here – it took me six months of this haunting feeling to actually commit to doing music full-time after graduation and then another three months of actually figuring out how to make a living with writing and performing. I also didn’t want to wait until I was playing stadiums to impact folks like Taylor impacted me. I wanted to do it now.
So for the last year, I’ve toured and played house shows all over the country. They are an amazing way to connect deeply – I sing songs I write from my toilet for like 45 minutes, tell my story, and try to love everyone there by bringing some joy. I’ve played over 100 since last August and met so many amazing people from all over because the great thing about the house show is that yes, it’s an hour of a concert, but on each side, I’m just hanging out with these dope friend groups and eating chips and queso and stuff.
That’s the main beef of how I got to constantly touring, writing, and releasing music that matters to me.
Has it been a smooth road?
I don’t know if any road worth traveling is smooth. This one has definitely been bumpy-to-mountainous – even before all the COVID disruption. In the moment, the trials suck, but I’m really thankful for them in retrospect.
The first thing I had to get over was my ego. I literally ate up any positive opinion and praise I could get from people my whole life. It was my motivation – however subconscious – in everything. That may sound like super diabolical or manipulative, but it took a lot of self-reflection to identify that as a major weakness. So moving from being the ‘model student people-pleaser’ to being the musician who lives out of his car and sleeps on couches’ wasn’t exactly the easiest thing for my pride to endure.
Then after you decide to do something hard or uncomfortable, I feel like a lot of times we expect it not necessarily to be an easy road but to be at least a rewarding and fulfilling one. But that’s not always the promise. About two months after graduation, I had a single release that totally flopped. It was my first taste of public, exposed failure. I felt crushed. Defeated. My whole life, I’ve dealt with things like this by writing music. The verse I wrote the next day, “You told me there would be a burden to carry, but I’d rather be married if the burden’s gonna be this hard. I dove off the deep end on 285 listening to All Too Well but I was so unwell that night” became the lead single of this new project, You Are Loved. It releases Wednesday, August 12th.
The reason I bring up the song is because that first line really sums up the theme of my struggle in this season – I often feel alone, like no one understands what I’m doing or what I’m going through. Meanwhile, my friends have steady jobs, rocking community, and are getting married. That’s what this new project deals with – the feeling of being alone. That’s the great lie of loneliness isn’t it? That we are in fact alone. Because in reality, we all have that in common, feeling alone, misunderstood, left out. Whatever it is, it’s usually a lie, but that doesn’t make it any less real in the moment. But I definitely struggle with those thoughts like 7,000 times a day.
Outside of all this deep stuff there’s also just the fact that music is a rejection-riddled industry and of course the vaunted COVID-19. Thankfully I grew up playing baseball, so I’m cool with the failure rate. The coronavirus swept the land when I was on tour up the East Coast on the way from Philly to New York City. I had 27 official shows canceled and had to alter my release plans, so definitely struck my journey pretty hard. I love being on the road and playing live shows, but I feel like it opened the door for different types of good – time with family and my grandma, writing songs for people, learning and growing in faith, and getting to connect with each person I’ve met at house shows.
Can you give our readers some background on your music?
Music is the avenue, but my purpose is to impact people. Whether it’s a house show and bringing joy to a community for a night or writing a song that cuts to the core of the sometimes-lonely, always-difficult journey of life – my hope is to encourage one person into freedom to be who they are created to be.
As an artist, I try less to be “new” as to be relatable. I want people to hear my music and hear their own story in it, see their own life, decisions, struggles, happiness. But thematically, the content of my songs is relatively unique. I don’t really write “love songs” in the traditional sense. Every song ever is basically a love song to something, but mine are almost like this “anti-love song” movement where I may sing about love or the struggle of finding it, but they are mostly about how hard yet beautiful life is.
Musically, it’s kind of a hybrid between singer-songwriter and pop, heavily influenced by John Denver, James Taylor, and Jim Croce, but also by Taylor Swift, Maggie Rogers, HAIM, and CHVRCHES. My MO’s are meaningful lyrics, builds and vocal loops, and walking the line between sad and hopeful.
Everything I do as a musician is designed to give, not to take. All my art (t-shirts, albums, videos, photos) is always created by and supporting my friends. My house concerts are free so as to not create a financial barrier for any fan who wants to host. And I set aside a lot of time to be a friend to my fans. People want to be seen, so that’s what I try to do – see and love.
Any shoutouts? Who else deserves credit in this story – who has played a meaningful role?
Oh my Lanta. Who deserves credit – pretty much an endless list here.
First of all, Mom, Dad, and my sister, Elise, have been so supportive. It’s always refreshing to chat with them while on the road, find a hidden care package in my car, or come home to their love (and my dog). My Aunt Linda and Uncle Bret, and Aunt Angie and Uncle Chuck have been rocks as well. They live outside Athens and in Austin, respectively, and love me really well. They are very helpful in quelling the starving artist stereotype, as I am never hungry when there.
I have had two really key mentors. One is Greg Lisson, who is walking me through this troubadour era of my life spiritually. Another is Andrew Huang (Andrew Blooms), who produced both of my records and mentored me for three years in college, showing me that it was possible to do something unorthodox. Much love to them. Lewey Knox, Troy Earnest, and Drew Beskin have been incredibly important to me as well. Very grateful for them.
None of what I do would be possible without my legendary hosts on the road, who put on the shows and often provide a couch so that my mother doesn’t lose sleep that I’m sleeping in my car. At the risk of leaving someone off – Christian Cullen, Harrison Cowart, Isabella Mateu, Corey Spencer, the Yarborough Family, Annika Jonker, Sam McWhorter, Richie Chapman, the Trautweins, Elisabeth Ostwalt, Camille High, Julia Melnick, the Icebox, The Croft Queens (Anna, CB, Mel, Rachel, Gracie, Haley), 801 gals (Dakota, Morielle, Eleanor, Marie-Claire), Cole and Camille Whalen, the Templets, Sidney Scott, Ashely Crowley and Elizabeth Davis, Max Olsen, Paul Hernandez, Nate Bryant, Ryan Hilscher, Hannah Smith, Alyssa Carr, Faith Wilkerson, Jess Morton, Braeden Murphy, and all my Waco friends, Tim Felz, Hannah Glass, Naomi Headrick, Warren Fitzpatrick, Caroline Carver Miller, the Blue House, Jack, Alex, Zach, Brendan, and the FCF gang, Caroline Sandercock Black, Ryce Rolles, Jess Howell, Jennie Montgomery, Leo Mateu, the Sloan Street fellas, Derek Allen, Craig Bell, Lexi Willow, Stephen and Laura Mundy, Michael Gallo, Jonathan Barksdale, Simeon Wallace, the HOT House, Gracie, Sidney, basically all of Boone, Eric Panther, Michel Russo, Campeche, Emily Flower and the Antioch crew, Brock Garrigan, JW Alderman, John and Maggie Braucher, Mekenzie Jackson, Taylor Blaise, Caroline Odom, Peebs, Rachel Martin, Julia and the Girling family, Patrick Meehan, Mercer Craighill, and the Stokes! More members of the army are Brother Fitzpatrick, Adam Rioux, Carlton Miller, Jackson Smith, Jacob Mallow, Jonathan Yarborough, Toni Hunlen, Savannah Shaw, Mariah Williams, Alex Mowry, Anna Murphy, Carson Reynolds, Michael Gallo, Sheridan Davenport, Chandler Fowler and of course Dr Ruthie Colgrove.
Contact Info:
- Website: http://babernathy.com
- Email: BA@babernathy.com
Image Credit:
Brother Fitzpatrick, Jackson Smith, John Hayden, Ed LaRiviere, Carlton Miller
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