Today we’d like to introduce you to Dr. DeYonne Parker.
Hi Dr. Parker, so excited to have you with us today. What can you tell us about your story?
Most people would say that I’m a well-educated woman by most standards. I’m a college graduate, I have an honorary doctorate in Philosophy and hold several certifications in adult learning and leadership development.But there was a time in my life where I had several degrees in FAKIN’, FOOLIN’ and FRONTIN’! For real! I thought I could “fix” all that was broken in me; I thought I could outrun the pain and mask all the messes that I had experienced in my life. At the age of 18, I was violently attacked by my sister’s abusive boyfriend during one of his terrifying rants. As a result of that attack, I suffered a lifelong injury from a 6-inch butcher knife and began to live a fearful and inauthentic life. I lost my self-confidence, my Walk with God, my Attitude of Gratitude and placed my Gifts and Talents on the shelf… I lost my S.W.A.G. I spent years walking around thinking and saying, “I’m OK! I’m fine… it didn’t happen to me. I wasn’t the real victim.” While I truly know and felt that I didn’t suffer nearly as much pain and anguish as my sister, those words couldn’t have been further from the truth… I wasn’t “OK”.
I struggled for many years trying to rebuild myself, but not really fully acknowledging that something did “happen” to me. Something deep inside of me broke the night that I was stabbed, but I wanted to distance myself from that terrible incident and all the memories that came with it. So, I did. I convinced myself that it was not my story and I wouldn’t allow it to define me. But, doing this didn’t make the effects of the incident immediately disappear. No, the tentacles of this trauma just later showed up in various areas of my life. Where I was once confident, fear took over. As time passed and I got older, I saw myself shrink in areas of my life where I would normally have shown up with boldness. I wouldn’t speak up or out even when I knew that I could and should because I was fearful of the reaction I might receive if I revealed my true thoughts and feelings. Disappointment and hurt caused by other people in my life felt larger than life and took a huge toll on me.
Following that incident, I experienced some pretty low points in my life, my father died a gruesome death in prison, my marriage began to experience serious turbulence, and I made some poor choices in trying to cover all the pain I was experiencing. Instead of dealing with all of this, I filed it away with all the other pain. I felt dead inside and convinced myself that I could live this way, but it became evident that I could not. I tried to hold it all together with a smile on my face and my favorite two words, “I’m fine”! I assumed this was what other people expected from me, and I had no intentions of letting them down. I went on like this for years. Instead of seeking the Lord for his wise counsel, I tried desperately to fix myself by myself. Not knowing there were layers of paint that needed healing, I went down this lonely journey by myself. Needless to say, I lost myself and all that sparkly stuff that God placed on the inside of me that made me who I was called to be. I was living an inauthentic life, trying to please everyone and mask what I was truly feeling inside. It wasn’t until one particular rough season in my life that I realized that I had finally run out of Band-Aids and artificial fillers to cover up the wounds from my life’s harsh realities. I was officially BROKEN! BUT GOD… used my youngest sister (my wonder twin) to remind me that He loved me and He didn’t want me to live in pain to please other people. He wanted me to be authentic and at my best so that He could use my life for His purpose.
After that conversation, I began to take bigger steps towards the Lord. I could hear the Lord tell me that it was time to get up from my dark corner and get back what I lost. He showed me that I lost my self-confidence (which comes from Him), He showed me where I lost my walk with Him, He showed me that my attitude needed to be adjusted and that I was hiding the gifts and talents that He gave me. He showed me that I lost my S.W.A.G. and that I needed to get it back! The Lord had me revisit those dark places in my life and write about them. He gave me a very specific title, “Girl, Get Your S.W.A.G. Back!”. As I wrote, He cleared away all the leftover residue from painful experiences in my life, and He healed me in places that I didn’t realize were still broken. I could feel His presence around me, and I could hear His voice tell me that this work, this book was for somebody else who was broken, bitter and in bondage. He used my brokenness for His glory, and I am forever grateful. I’ve survived some of this world’s most typical and pressing trials and tribulations- personal, spiritual, and professional. Along the way, I created a set of mindset tools, carefully designed to drill past the pain and to both reveal and enable me to live the clarity of my true purpose on this planet. Girl, Get Your S.W.A.G. Back is the first book that I wrote and is the catalyst for The S.W.A.G. University, where women go through a powerful 6-week guided journey to getting their S.W.A.G. back. I am now the author of a 2nd publication If Her Purse Could Talk – a clever compilation of stories from courageous women, I’m a lifestyle and leadership coach that empowers ladies, leaders and little girls to courageously shine in their courage zone, and I’m now the host of the Girl, Get Your SWAG Back Podcast.
I’m sure you wouldn’t say it’s been obstacle free, but so far would you say the journey has been a fairly smooth road?
The journey to finding and living out my life’s purpose has not been easy. There were many roadblocks and lessons learned along the way. I struggled with: Self-doubt – I questioned my skills and abilities along the way but what I questioned the most was my worthiness of such responsibility. Many failed attempts – I don’t give up easy and the many failed attempts that I had along the way built my character, my skill and my story. I use every failed attempt to encourage someone else to keep going. Failure is inevitable but what you do with it is up to you. Learn from it. Lack of support – Whew! I learned a valuable lesson when it came to supporting. Those that you want to support you may not be ready to support you. They may not understand your vision or how to support you, and it can feel like a lonely journey, but God will send the right people to support you. They may be different from who you thought would be in your corner, but sometimes that’s necessary. Carefully managing my career and my calling. Trying to find the time to work on my calling while maintaining a full-time career is a challenge that many faces on their way to success and living out their dream. No different for me. I just had to look at it as fuel for my dreams and take every lesson I learned and apply it appropriately.
Appreciate you sharing that. What else should we know about what you do?
DeYonne Parker, PhD, CPC, affectionately dubbed “The Courage Catalyst” by a re-energized leadership client, is the author and publisher of critically-acclaimed women’s lifestyle books, “If Her Purse Could Talk” and “Girl, Get Your S.W.A.G. Back!”; the co-owner and co-executive socialpreneur at Gem Makers, LLC—a worldwide, progressive, leadership development education, training, and coaching firm for women; and the founder and visionary coaching industry disrupter at The S.W.A.G. University. Set in Atlanta, Georgia—the crown jewel in America’s newly-diversified media, entertainment, and digital legacy—Gem Makers, LLC and The S.W.A.G. University have swiftly become the optimal solution for women seeking the clarity, confidence, and courage required to brilliantly transform into effective leaders in their professional lives and communities. From Europe to South America and the Middle East—and at almost every geographical point in between—Dr. DeYonne has also been electrifying, inspiring, and activating speaking audiences with her engaging style and highly informative and innovative content. A tireless motivator, she is additionally the host of the brand new inspirational podcast, “Girl, Get Your SWAG Back!”, at: anchor.FM/girlgetyourswagback and everywhere podcasts are heard. Services: Through courses, coaching, creative content, and unique experiences, Dr. Parker and the Gem Makers team help women recognize, embrace and go beyond their brilliance to full-on operating in their Brilliant Zone.
What do you like and dislike about the city?
I absolutely love the rich culture of Atlanta! I’m a native Nebraskan turned Georgia Peach, and I love that there are so many things to do here in Atlanta… from music to theater to sports to finding unique places to dine out. I am also excited by the various opportunities that are available to me as a black businesswoman and seeing other women that look like me thriving in their fields. I love the food and the gentle nature of the many people that I’ve met over the course of my 22 years here. If I had to put something I dislike about Atlanta, it would be the traffic… (Insert sigh and grunt here) and the lack of public transit. For such a booming city that is expected to grow exponentially in the next few years, there has to be a better way to commute in and out to the city.
Contact Info:
- Email: dparker@gemmakers.org
- Website: www.DeYonneParker.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deyonneparker/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deyonneparker
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrDeYonne
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/deyonneparker
Image Credits
Photography credit to Kimazing Photos at www.KimazingPhotos.com.
