Meet Hector and Derek Del Valle

Today we’d like to introduce you to Hector And Derek Del Valle.

Hi Hector and Derek, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
We’re Hector + Derek, aka Papi & Papa

We’ve been married for almost eight years and share a love for adventure, visiting 27 national parks together since falling in love with them on our 2019 honeymoon in Alaska. These days, our greatest adventure is raising our son, Oliver, who’s somehow already almost four and has explored 14 parks with us.

In 2022, we became dads through independent surrogacy with the help of two lifelong friends. We were there for every appointment, every milestone, and every moment we could be—an experience that made our journey to parenthood even more meaningful.

We started sharing about our journey to fatherhood online because representation matters and we didn’t see any families like us growing up. We want LGBTQ+ people to see that love, family, and parenthood are possible and that there is a place for them in this world. If sharing our lives helps even one person feel seen or gives them hope for their own future, it’s worth every post.

Last summer we received a random email about a casting opportunity featuring gay dads for a unique makeover experience that also sheds light on gay fatherhood. We were already sold because who wouldn’t like a makeover but the fact that this would also be an opportunity to represent our community really put the cherry on top – why? Because we never saw same sex families on TV or around us growing up. We think about the hope it would bring us as teenagers seeing that it’s possible because there was a time we didn’t. The minute we found out that it would be on RuPaul’s Drag Race, let alone All Stars had us gagged. We have been watching Drag Race since day 1 and now as parents, our Friday nights look a bit different but the one thing that remains the same is watching drag queens – from clubs to couches we still get our fix.

I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?
As two guys, becoming parents comes with a lot of struggles and bumps along the way. We spent several years learning about surrogacy and fertility treatments while working side jobs and saving every extra dollar we could to make our dream of becoming parents a reality.

One thing that was especially important to us was finding a surrogate who was local and someone we truly knew and trusted. In the beginning, that felt almost impossible. We had several emotional and difficult conversations with potential surrogates before finally finding the right person — someone who genuinely believed in helping us build our family. Looking back now, those hard moments were worth it because they led us to the person who was meant to walk this journey with us.

After our friend generously donated her eggs, we had them divided so we could each create our own batches of embryos. That entire process came with so much emotion attached to it. Waiting for the phone calls about the total egg count, how many eggs fertilized, how many became embryos, and ultimately how many were viable was one of the most stressful experiences we’ve ever gone through. Every update felt life-changing, and every number carried so much hope.

There were moments of fear, uncertainty, and exhaustion where it felt like everything rested on things completely outside of our control. But through all of it, we leaned on each other. This journey tested our patience, strengthened our relationship, and reminded us how deeply we wanted to become dads.

Even with all the challenges, we wouldn’t change the path we took. Every struggle, every setback, and every emotional moment has made this journey feel even more meaningful. It’s taught us that family is built through love, commitment, sacrifice, and the incredible people willing to help make those dreams possible.

Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
Hector — I’ve been a graphic designer since 2011, and creativity has always been at the center of who I am. I got my start at Liquid Creative Studio, a full-service creative and digital marketing agency in Gainesville, Florida. During my eight years there, I had the opportunity to build visual brands for a wide range of B2B and B2C organizations across industries including healthcare, local government, fitness and wellness, real estate, and education.

One of the things I loved most about my work was helping organizations discover and communicate who they truly were. Every project began with a deep brand discovery process — understanding the industry, uncovering what made the organization unique, and defining how they could genuinely connect with the people they served. From there, I would create a visual identity that reflected their strengths and told their story in an authentic way.

While I truly enjoyed the creative side of agency life and the opportunity to work across so many different brands and industries, the pace and mental workload eventually became overwhelming. I found myself approaching burnout and started thinking more seriously about the future I wanted with my husband and the family we hoped to build together. Deep down, I knew it wouldn’t be sustainable for me to continue giving everything I had to work while also preparing emotionally, mentally, and financially for the journey of becoming parents — especially through surrogacy.

After an exhausting job search trying to find something that felt like the right fit, I was fortunate to be contacted by a friend working at Infotech, an e-Construction software company that developed the first bid-rigging detection software for the road and highway construction industry. That opportunity truly changed the trajectory of my life.

I started as a Senior Visual Designer and eventually transitioned into my current role as Brand Manager. I still get to do what I love — building and evolving brands — but now I’m able to focus deeply on one company and one mission. It has given me the space and headspace to be more intentional, more creative, and more fulfilled in my work as technology and the industry continue to evolve.

More importantly, the role has allowed me to create the kind of balance I always hoped for in life. Infotech offers inclusive parental benefits, including IVF support, which meant so much to us as we navigated our path to parenthood. Having a workplace that genuinely supports families like ours has made a huge difference.
Today, I’m able to continue growing as a designer and brand builder while also having the flexibility to work from home, be present for our son, support my husband, and fully embrace the role that matters most to me — being the best dad I can be.

Derek — I was an elementary school teacher for eight years, working with students with disabilities from kindergarten through fifth grade. Teaching was never just a job to me — it was something I poured my heart into every single day. Supporting children through their growth, celebrating their milestones, and helping them believe in themselves was incredibly meaningful work.

When our son was born, I decided to take two years away from the classroom because I wanted to give that same energy, love, and dedication to him. I wanted to pour everything I had learned through my education degree and teaching experience into his development, while also soaking in every little moment of new parenthood — the cuddles, the sleepless nights, the first smiles, all of it. Those years were some of the most fulfilling of my life.

I eventually returned to teaching for a year, but I found myself coming home emotionally exhausted and increasingly frustrated with the education system. Living in Florida as a gay man — and now as a father — made being a teacher feel especially difficult because of the “Don’t Say Gay” bill and the environment it created. It became painful to feel like I had to hide or avoid talking about one of the things I am most proud of: my family. I kept asking myself, why continue pouring so much of myself into my students while feeling like I couldn’t openly and honestly share who I am or the life I’ve built with the people I love most?

Now, I work for UFLI (University of Florida Literacy Institute) as an Implementation Specialist, and it has truly been a blessing for both me and my family. I support educators around the world in implementing UFLI Foundations, a research-based and evidence-based phonics program that helps children become confident readers. I still get to make an impact in education, but now I can do it in a way that feels healthier, more sustainable, and more aligned with the kind of father, husband, and person I want to be.

Do you have recommendations for books, apps, blogs, etc?
Before becoming parents, we joined a Surrogates and Intended Parents group on Facebook, and honestly, that community became such an important part of our journey. We spent over a year quietly reading and learning about all the different paths people were taking to build their families. It opened our eyes not only to the beauty of surrogacy and IVF journeys, but also to the emotional, financial, and physical challenges so many people face when it comes to fertility. It gave us a much deeper appreciation for how much strength and resilience it takes for people to become parents in so many different ways.

We also followed several Instagram pages and organizations that specifically support LGBTQ+ families, including Gays With Kids and Men Having Babies. Seeing families that looked like ours was incredibly reassuring and empowering during a process that can sometimes feel overwhelming and isolating. Those resources helped us better understand the surrogacy process, connect with other intended parents, and learn about grants, financial support, and educational opportunities that made family planning feel more attainable.

As parents now, we still lean heavily on community and shared experiences. Whether it’s parenting groups, social media accounts, or simply hearing other families talk honestly about their journeys, it reminds us that none of us are doing this alone.

When it comes to podcasts, we definitely have a few favorites that help get us through the workday and long commutes. We love Las Culturistas, Good Hang with Amy Poehler, and of course, Drag Her! A Rupaul’s Drag Race Podcast.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/papi_and_papa/
• Email: papiandpapafl@gmail.com