Meet Annette Saldana of Irresistible Requests in Atlanta + NY

Today we’d like to introduce you to Annette Saldana.

Before we jump into specific questions about the business, why don’t you give us some details about you and your story.
My early years were spent in NY and one of the things I first remember was trouble I got in after deciding to walk a friend home. You see, I got off at an earlier bus stop to do so. And when my mother saw the schoolbus pull up at our usual stop in Flushing, I wasn’t there.

I don’t know how long it took me to arrive, but I’m told I came skipping down the sidewalk in Queens like nothing had happened.

I was five.

I think about it now what that moment must have been like for her… a new mother—exiled from Cuba—I would have freaked out as well! In fact, I did!

(Three decades later, I lost my two year old in the Cayman Islands for about 30 minutes. It’s amazing how long 30 minutes can be.)

But that was only the beginning of me taking my own path, breaking the rules to help another, and of course… freaking out my mother. These three actions have followed me through the various roles I play in life—as a mother, a daughter, an entrepreneur, a yogi—making them, perhaps, the most defining aspects of who I am.

I’ve certainly exhibited all three while helping people get what they want by talking and listening their way to it. This stems from my profound understanding that communication is THE process through which we create, invent, and innovate together. Conscious communication is the heart of coordinated action and achievement. And it’s not only the conversations we have with others, but also the ones we have with ourselves that count the most.

Was your career path somewhat linear then?
Not at all. Full disclosure: I wasn’t born this way. I was not one of those natural charmers who at age eight could approach anyone with an audacious request–and magically entice them to say “yes!” despite their better judgment.

I was so shy it hurt. I couldn’t speak to more than one person without hearing my own heartbeat. My parents were delighted when I made it through high school without incident. I didn’t know it then, but my leadership style was Ms. Idealist. Natural caretaker and true believer who never stops hoping? Yep, that’s me. Asking for what I wanted in life felt contrary to my instincts. I’ve always been more comfortable making sure everyone else is comfortable. Why rock the boat?

This was my story—but it began to change around the time when I decided I wanted to change the world. (Or, one tiny piece of it, anyway.)

At the age of 18, I started helping a non-profit called The Hunger Project as a citywide coordinator for Atlanta. In my quest to help reduce world hunger, I quickly realized that the ability to naturally, from the heart, ask for what mattered most was the single biggest success factor in my relationships, earnings, and in building effective organizations.

So, I got good at making requests fast! I worked with several mentors, received a communication/public speaking course scholarship, practiced and practiced, and then practiced some more until I could speak from my heart rather than my head.

Not only did this lead to $85,000 in donations for THProject that year, but the ability to naturally, effectively, ask and  has since allowed me to spend more than 20 years helping artists, entrepreneurs, and executive leaders move the world with nothing but their words.

I started my company 11 years ago, energizing clients like American Express and Ogilvy & Mather with programs that fueled purpose-driven instincts and transformed fear driven attitudes. Meanwhile, I was following my own purpose-driven instincts, pursuing my long love of music—I interned at Joe’s Pub (of The Public Theater) with the amazing duo, Bill Bragin and Shanta Thake Kriegsmann.

In 2011, two friends and I got to talking about starting a music festival. I’m still blown away that with only 11 brave dreamers on the board, some well-designed conversations, unapologetic grit and grins… we started the Gasparilla Music Festival and sold over 6,000 tickets in under eight months! It surpassed all expectations and still thrives today.

In 2012, I launched The Art + Science of Irresistible Requests with a commitment to level the playing field for women. It’s been a proven source of achievement and connection for some courageous and committed women, and the best is yet to come! We’re launching again in June after a two year-long sabbatical. I had to recover from a debacle with a venture capitalist and a couple of medical interruptions that followed at home in my family. They were absolutely the darkest days of my life. I’m so grateful for the incredible support I received. As we prepare to launch again, I’m more than ever present to the power of this body of work because without the ability to “perceive more and ask for more” I am 99% certain that I wouldn’t be here right now talking to you.

Overall, has running your own business been relatively smooth? If not, what were some of the struggles along the way?
That experience with the VC investor may have happened years ago, but the struggle it created was lasting—like a trauma. Basically, we had an operating agreement that the investor and I had both aligned on, agreed on, and signed. Six months later, a new operating agreement was introduced that would have stripped me of my earnings under some guise of “a cashless exercise” if I signed. I didn’t. I’m so thankful I was able to stay true to myself under the pressure. There were threats that I found to be temporarily debilitating, manipulation, and harassment that followed for months badgering me to sign something I knew was a violation of everything I stood for.

It was heartbreaking and terrifying all at once. My team and I had worked tirelessly and not signing might mean all our work would be fruitless. But I knew signing would guarantee our work would be fruitless… because those terms were not what we’d been working for. I couldn’t sign under those terms.

It was really a disappointment for everyone involved. I had to let go of employees and a team of 12 partners and consultants. The cash was pulled out immediately and I’ll never forget the embarrassment and shame of holding up a line for 20 minutes at Publix while doing the credit card shuffle for groceries. There were lots of moments like that and I’m thankful to a community of friends who kept me sane and alive throughout them all.

It cost me a lot to not sign. But what I gained is immeasurable.

In my search for healing I integrated a whole body of new practices (fasting, yoga, travel, live music, and dance…) that enriched my arsenal of tools for living life fully, as I want to live it. I reclaimed my body, my mind, and spirit and am excited to share what I’ve learned with others.

These challenges left me with a joyful soul… something I could never have envisioned just a year ago today. But I’m here, against the odds, collaborating with some incredible women and we are weeks from launching Irresistible Requests again, plus a new community called REACH.

What take-away from your struggles over the last few years are you bringing to this relaunch?
After the debacle, in September 2015, I found myself working in the pit crew at the Baja Rally for a motorcycle racer. While there, I studied the mindset of champions. When I heard the words: “Don’t you dare fall out of that seat!” something inside me woke up.

I got it. Don’t give up. No matter what life throws at you. Don’t fall out of that seat. And I had. In fact, I was almost off the road entirely.

It’s been a long time since someone dared me to be great. In my life, I’m usually the one doing that for others. But this time, in Baja, I suddenly felt the adrenaline rush of someone daring me once again—and that someone was myself.

I’d been struggling with that aforementioned setback.

But after spending the last 20+ years helping people learn to live with feelings of doubt, concerns about failure, and other debilitating mindsets that get in the way of achieving greatness, the one thing I know is: you can’t find your way OUT without first going IN. That’s where real solutions live.

In my case, finding my way out didn’t involve exploring those things “happening to me”—rather, I had to explore… me.

So that summer, I hit the road, made a few trips and dove into the deep end of the pool. I had to give up running away from the pain of failure and do whatever it took to embrace it. So that was first.

I gave myself a month alone in Havana. I had to get quiet, reflect, and accept the circumstances I found myself in—which honestly, sounds much simpler than it is. I had to explore these myths about anxiety that are set up and fed by our Western notions of well being. The message we get is that happiness is “normal”. But what happens if and when happiness isn’t the norm? We’re led to believe something must therefore be “wrong” in these moments, which we need to “fix” before we can get back to the business of living. I had to come to grips with the truth… these moments of struggle are living. Perhaps, they’re the most important moments of living. I realized that if you look closely at people’s lives, you’ll find that significant pain and struggle are companions to all. Not only that, I had to accept that from the position I was in now, there was no way I could wait for my worries, anxieties, and fears to go away before I could start living a life that mattered to me.   

I had to learn how to live better without first having to think and feel better. That meant asking for what mattered most. One of the benefits of teaching Irresistible Requests is being constantly reminded that I have a right to assert myself, even though I may inconvenience others. This isn’t a popular mindset  – but that doesn’t discount the fact that just because other people might not be assertive doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t be. And I desperately needed help just to focus on the essentials: taking care of my kids and taking care of my body.

My friends, (who are equally my trusted advisors) were helping me navigate appointments with doctors, making sense of my home, digging up the latest research, all while fielding my calls of panic. And it must be said: I have curated a life of extraordinary friendships with extraordinary people, the kind of people who can weather any shit storm with wisdom, intellect, and grace. They believe the impossible can be made possible and demonstrate it in the meaningful lives they lead.

So these are the views we’re building from now. How do we cultivate an authentic and nurturing support network for women that fuels resilience and mindset shifts with play + ease?

What I discovered on this journey within moved me deeply.

It’s been 14 years since I started my business and I believe in the community that we built here. Our history is woven together by those magical moments where clients gained a deeper understanding of who they are, celebrated the victories, grieved the unmanifested goals, and marveled at the improbable futures that they afforded. Nothing came easily, but sharing it together with deep respect and unconditional support certainly made it easier.

There are a lot of differences, but there’s one thing we have in common: an incredible capacity to think, create, and imagine.

This community has incredible meaning for me. It was with this community that I went IN to find my way OUT of some of the greatest hardship of my life.

I’m returning to this community now, with this re-launch, having experienced firsthand the force of good that it is.

Please tell us about Irresistible Requests.
When it comes to Irresistible Requests, here’s what I’m most proud of: the difference we’ve made in helping women own their natural power to negotiate and get raises, and helping our clients stay in the game even after striking out on their own. To help women (and men!) recognize their value and give themselves the permission to ask (and win) opportunities that are meaningful to them is super rewarding. We do a victory dance anytime we see our clients transcending their anxieties around asking for a raise, a sale, a second chance, or really anything!!!

I believe in the impact of the work I do. I believe without a doubt, that there is always more than meets the eye. I believe that with courage and imagination our words, can move the world and make possibilities real. I believe we can achieve more with a lot less effort and spend a lifetime being our own champions of opportunity. Irresistible Requests is my evidence for all of these beliefs.

If you had to go back in time and start over, would you have done anything differently?
It’s important to me that you know: a defining part of my expertise has been failure. I wasn’t born with mountains of courage or mindsets that inspired success. I’ve been kicked out of Catholic school and coaching programs, dropped out of college, failed diets and relationships, and as I mentioned even got my ass kicked by a VC investor three years ago. But it’s this failure—this unifying aspect of being human—and the perspectives I’ve gleaned along the way, that ultimately make my skills as valuable as they are. It’s the context behind the tools we offer that triples their worth.

If I regret any of my failures, then I’m also regretting all my successes. If I hadn’t grown up shy, I would never have experienced the journey of finding my voice—and the VALUE in that journey, for myself and potentially for others. I’m doing what I feel I was born to do, and every single experience in my life has led me here… so how could I wish I’d done anything differently?

So, what’s next for you?
I have often said my life is a great experiment. There’s only one thing on the agenda. Testing the limits of the difference we can make. Together.

I believe that everything I have gone through is in service of my community and up for examination in the name of possibility. I have no interest in saving face or playing cowardly games. I’m staying on my seat. And I’m on a mission to help others do the same.

Most immediately, with three fellow powerhouse women at my side. Individually, we are each other’s different checks and balances—bringing unique skills, brains, and hearts to our work to ultimately enrich its message and its resonance. Together, we are The Collective— committed to the same one goal of transforming what it means to be not only a working woman, but a woman who dreams. And because we’re seriously aligned and taking on IWD’s theme of #BalanceforBetter we’ve been brainstorming about some ways we want to make a difference on Equal Pay Day (This date symbolizes how far into the year women must work to earn what men earned in the previous year, this year it was on April 2).  

In addition, I’m continuing my Yoga Studies with Leigh Ann Neal at Nirvana Yoga, (highly recommend her teacher training) and I’m currently in Germany with nexofonia (an association co-founded with Ani Petrosian and Boogie Wuhl) for our first 5‐week, interdisciplinary world music exchange + festival. Our inaugural title for this year’s festival is “Audio Tierra”.

Talk about testing limits!  We’ve brought 7 innovative musicians from Havana (The Cuban Lions, El Individuo, DJ Lapiz) to Cologne to collaborate with this phenomenal jazz group named the PAO Kollektiv. As you can see #BalanceforBetter is something I’m claiming personally as well as professionally!

What’s next for me largely depends on what’s next for the women reading this right now. I’m offering you a team of fellow women that will help them dream big and achieve big, too. That team might be Irresistible Requests, launching June 6th, for women who know what they want but don’t know how to ask for it. Or it could be a new program I’m offering called REACH. Directly sprung from my own personal struggle over the last few years, REACH is for people who don’t even know yet what they want. It’s for people in the place where I recently found myself: lost. But like I’ve said, we can only find our way out by first going in—we go from lost to found by finding ourselves. REACH is for those who want to explore and embrace who they really are, discover what they want most in life, and spark rapid mindset shifts to help them actually get it.

So, testing those limits is always what’s next for me. No matter the community you choose, I hope it’s what is next for you, too.

Pricing:

• REACH is a new offering. My way of saying thanks. REACH for what you really want in life without denying or pushing aside who you really are. REACH rapid mindset shifts to help you get what you want most in business, love, and life. REACH the support you need, when you most need it. 12 months. $600
• Private Coaching Packages start at $2,500 and are priced upon request depending on the nature of engagement.
• Irresistible Requests begins June 6. If you decide that YOU would like to participate in this revolution yourself, you should know the Irresistible Requests program was once offered at $2500. Because of my gratitude and my commitment to make this available at the speed of light to women everywhere, I’ve decided to reduce the price of this exclusive coaching program to $1250. Those who take immediate action and register before May 10 will receive an additional discount of $650 for an early action price of $600. Why? Again, gratitude… to you and for you.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.annettesaldana.com
• Email: annette@annettesaldana.com
• Instagram: @annettesaldana
• Twitter: @annettesaldana
• Other: https://medium.com/@annettesaldana

Image Credit:
some by Jordan Hicks, dance photo by Thom Baker

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